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Funny jokes from Sex Advice Blog

 So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

The 1st floor sign on the door reads:

Floor 1: These men have jobs.
The 2nd floor sign reads:

Floor 2: These men have Jobs and Love Kids.

The 3rd floor sign reads:

Floor 3: These men have Jobs, Love Kids and are extremely good looking.
“Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the 4th floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4: These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and help with Housework.
“Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!”
Still, she goes to the 5th floor and sign reads:

Floor 5: These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, help with Housework and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the 6th floor and the sign reads:

Floor 6: You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor.
There are no men on this floor.
This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.
Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

To avoid gender bias charges, the store’s owner opens a New Wives store just across the street.

The 1st first floor has wives that love sex.

The 2nd floor has wives that love sex and have money.

The 3rd,4th, 5th and 6th floors have never been visited

BEOWULF
Paramount Pictures Presents
In Association with Shangri-La Entertainment
An ImageMovers Production
A Robert Zemeckis Film
Executive Producers Martin Shafer Roger Avary Neil Gaiman
Screenplay by Neil Gaiman & Roger Avary
Produced by Steve Starkey Robert Zemeckis Jack Rapke
Directed by Robert Zemeckis

CAST: Ray Winstone, Anthony Hopkins, John Malkovich, Robin Wright Penn, Brendan Gleeson, Crispin Glover, Alison Lohman, and Angelina Jolie

SYNOPSIS: In a legendary time of heroes, the mighty warrior Beowulf battles the demon Grendel and incurs the hellish wrath of the beast’s ruthlessly seductive mother.  Their epic clash forges the timeless legend of Beowulf.
Groundbreaking director Robert Zemeckis offers a unique vision of the Beowulf saga in a way that it has never been told before. “Beowulf” stars RAY WINSTONE in the title role and ANTHONY HOPKINS as the corrupt King Hrothgar, as well as JOHN MALKOVICH, ROBIN WRIGHT PENN, BRENDAN GLEESON, CRISPIN GLOVER, ALISON LOHMAN and ANGELINA JOLIE as Grendel’s mother.
Neil Gaiman (the graphic novel “Mirrormask,” “Sandman”) & Roger Avary (“Pulp Fiction”) have adapted the legend to the screen.

Last week I bought a new wireless Broadband Router after finally fixing my Streamyx connection. It cost me around RM 145.Since I always try to hack my neighbor wireless network (which I always fail) : ) so I think it’s better for me to get my own.

key features :

Up to 54 Mbps Wireless data rate


Up to 3x eXtended Range™ support to boost your Wireless network range to up to 200 meters (indoors) or 800meters (outdoors).


eXtended Range™ feature interoperable with other 3rd party devices


Compatible with IEEE802.11g, IEEE802.11b, IEEE802.3, IEEE802.3u standards


Increased signal sensitivity for better Throughput.


Increased security with WPA/WPA2 and WPA-PSK/WPA2-PSK authentication and TKIP/AES encryption security


Built-in firewall supporting IP address filtering, Domain Name filtering, and MAC address filtering


Integrated 4-port 10/100 Mbps Auto MDI-MDIX switch and detachable antenna


UPnP, Dynamic DNS, Static Routing, and VPN pass-through support


User-friendly Web browser-based configuration

 

Installation : easy start guide

1. connect your laptop to your router
2. make sure your modem is connected to your router
3. use the web manager and log in to 192.168.1.1
4. select dynamic ip and put your streamyx log in id
5. securing your wireless home network
6. select wireless menu setup
7. change SSID
8. apply security by selecting WPA-PSK/WPA2-PSK
9. ENTER a PSK passphrase wth a combination of number and letter
10. click save
11. WALA your connection is ON

12.  

official site : aztech wireless broadband

Its goods to increase your reflect..I mean your finger REFLECT if you know what I mean

more at blog.lankapo.com

Well if you have nothing to do, boring, tired maybe you can try this game. It can generate a 3d image from your drawing…

A lot of flash from this site zfrank.com

Is this for real ?

An old American Muslim lived on a farm in the mountains of eastern Kentucky with his young grandson. Each morning Grandpa was up early sitting at the kitchen table reading his Quraan. His grandson wanted to be just like him and tried to imitate him in every way he could. One day the grandson asked, “Grandpa, I try to read the Quraan just like you but I don’t understand it, and what I do understand I forget as soon as I close the book.What good does reading the Quraan do?”

The Grandfather quietly turned from putting coal in the stove and replied, “Take this coal basket down to the river and bring me back a basket of water.” The boy did as he was told, but all the water leaked out before he got back to the house. The grandfather laughed and said, “You’ll have to move a little faster next time,” and sent him back to the river with the basket to try again.

This time the boy ran faster, but again the basket was empty before he returned home. Out of breath, he told his grandfather that it was impossible to carry water in a basket, and he went to get a bucket instead. The old man said, “I don’t want a bucket of water; I want a basket of water. You’re just not trying hard enough,” and he went out the door to watch the boy try again. At this point, the boy knew it was impossible, but he wanted to show his grandfather that even if he ran as fast as he could, the water would leak out before he got back to the house.

The boy again dipped the basket into river and ran hard, but when he reached his grandfather the basket was again empty. Out of breath, he said, “See Grandpa, it’s useless!” “So you think it is useless?” The old man said, “Look at the basket.”

The boy looked at the basket and for the first time realized that the basket was different. It had been transformed from a dirty old coal basket and was now clean, inside and out. “Son, that’s what happens when you read the Quraan. You might not understand or remember everything, but when you read it, you will be changed, inside and out. That is the work of Allah in our lives.”

Ketupat bukan sebarang ketupat, ketupat dianyam di depan rumah.

Lemang bukan sebarag lemang, lemng dibakar di tepi sungai..

Pengalaman beraya tahun ini lebih menarik kerana tahun ini aku dengan secara rasminya mempunyai 2 kampung. Tangkak dan Kampar. Mukadimah raya pada 1428 dimulakan di Tangkak dan raya ketiga di Kampar.

Beraya di kampungku, tahun ini lebih meriah kerana di rumah baru yang lebih besar. Kami berpindah 2 hari sbelum raya. Walaupun nampak pelik, tapi pada aku ia praktikal. Semua adik beradik ada,semua lelaki pulak tu so apa lagi.Walaupun letih, aku dan adik beradik yang lain tetap bersemangat.Rumah teres baru kami lebih selesa dan lapang.

 Di kampar, aku rasa sangat bertuah kerana berpeluang merasai pengalaman beraya di Perak. Beraya sakan ke rumah saudara mara oleh ibu mertuaku, menyebabkan aku tersentuh. Dari rumah adik beradik,jiran lama,keluarga angkat semua di ziarah dalam suasana benar-benar mesra. Aku walaupun ahli baru dalam keluarga ini tidak terasa asing, kerana aku sudah dianggap seperti ahli keluarga. Cuma aku yang agak kekok.

Lemang yang di cari oleh isteriku akhirnya berjaya ditemui di Kampar. Di Tangkak, Ketupat palas adalah wajib, dan untuk keluarga kami, ketupat dianyam dan dimasak sendiri. Sebagai satu-satunya waris menganyam ketupat dari abah aku, tugas menganyam dijalankan dengan jayanya. Cuma tahun ni  ada bantuan

tambahan  dari adik ipar aku.

A friend of mine from hardyweb, tag me to show my desktop.

There you can find list of icon on my desktop, firefox, thunderbird, filehippo,picasa,my window live writer, and bla-bla.

Thanks hardy for the tag..

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